Bittersweet

They always say pick your battles.  First off, who is “they” and secondly, what if it is all batttles? 

All I can say is Daddy better watch out when the girls hit puberty because I will be hitting menopause at that time and boy oh boy, he will be in big trouble.  He is already making plans to live somewhere else during that time (like maybe the doghouse!).

And yes, I know, this too shall pass…just not fast enough!

Littlest is starting to do some standing and walking a tiny bit on her own.  Bug LOVES IT!

Both girls love this wagon, you could pull them in circles all day long and they would be happy.

In the last month and a half I’ve come across several blogs where very young (my girl’s age) children have died, unexpectantly.  I find myself drawn to reading them, even though I’ll end up crying (and sometimes at work during break).  One woman expresses her pain and feelings so very eloquently that you can feel her pain to the core of your bones.  The other expresses it in a more crass way and with anger (duh) and once again you feel her pain deep inside.   I have had enough pain and sadness, enough “stuff” that I don’t need to read about other people’s sorrow.  But yet I do.   I guess I feel a camaraderie of sorts with them because of our little boy.  It’s not exactly the same, but in a way it is.  We all had a child, a child who was healthy and all of a sudden wasn’t, mine just happened before he had a chance to be a little boy for barely a heartbeat. 

But I still have these two little imps who are my world.

It’s a good thing.

Elvis has been spotted and is in the building!

Who could resist this little Elvis impersonator?

I knew it had to happen sometime and thought it would have a long time ago.   After Littlest was done with her bath, I let Bug play in the tub for pretty much as long as she wanted.   Daddy was in watching her while I getting clothes ready for the next day.  All of sudden I heard a splash and a thump, then Daddy repeating over and over that it was okay.  I ran in and there was Bug standing on the bathroom floor saying, “oh no, oh no, OH NO!” and then looking in the tub.   Fortunately, I chose not to take a picture of this one.  In the tub was two…two additional items.  Bug was so upset to see them she had jumped out of the tub.  She then leaned over the side of the tub and pointed at the floaters and kept saying gross, yucky, and such.   Daddy said that Mommy would explain to her what it was.  Gee, thanks Daddy!  So, I reassured her it was okay and that it sometimes happens.  We talked about only pooping in a diaper or in the potty and also if she feels an urge to try to hold it in her bottom until she can get to the potty.   Talk about trying to think of things on the fly.  I didn’t know what to tell her.  All I know was that it wasn’t a big deal and didn’t want her to be upset.   It’s times like these that I’m glad I’m older because a lot of things aren’t worth getting upset over.   Oh yes, who do you think cleaned out the tub?   Mommy of course!

On a side note, Daddy and I received a huge compliment from three of the team members from Early Intervention yesterday.   They were telling us how far Littlest had come along and also how well Bug was speaking and that it was clearly obvious that we were taking the time to talk and read to our children.  Daddy said that of course we would, who wouldn’t talk to their children.  All three of them said that we would be amazed what people do or don’t do.  I can’t even imagine not talking to my children or showing them constantly that I love them.   They said we didn’t even want to hear how horrible people are.   That part is true.   It was a good feeling to be validated by professionals.   As Bug would say, “Good Job Daddy, Good Job Mama.”  Oh, and don’t forget the clapping.  

It seems like whenever Bug is with us, there is an adventure to be had.   Last night was no exception.   Daddy “misplaced” the dog leashes and we’ve been using bungee cords since the ropes he was using “disappeared.”  I decided it was time to get new ones.  We thought we would try the local Humane Society Thrift Store first  before heading to a big chain store.   Right off the bat, Bug found a pair of kids rain boots that were about 10 sizes too big for her, but she had to put them on and try to walk in them.   It didn’t go so well.  I convinced her to take them off, but couldn’t get her back into her own shoes without a huge fight.   We wandered around a bit, saw the live kitty cats, and I happened upon a pair of shiny white girl’s dress shoes that were a perfect size for Bug.  She’s a girlie girl so she immediately put on the shoes.   I found one dog leash, two small plates for a set of dishes I have, a rubber stamp, and a book.   Then we found the toys.  Bug likes dinosaurs right now and we found a bag of them.  She was excited about them until she saw “Dollie”….buried under the pile of stuffed animals, head turned around backwards, long blonde and pink hair all messed up, with a slightly dirty gymnastic suit and painted on shoes.   It was was love at first sight.  The dinosaurs were forgotten.   I told her to put the toys away and to take the dinosaurs if she wanted them.   She picked up the other toys, put the dinosaurs back in the bin and firmly embraced the doll.   She was not letting her go.   Even after more wandering and several attempts more, she was not giving up.  I figured for 99 cents, we could keep the doll.   The shoes were also 99 cents and she wasn’t letting me take those off either.   In the car, I tried to wash off the doll and did a fairly decent job before Bug had a melt down, it was her baby.  Once she got it back, she hugged and kissed it and gave me the stink eye!  I was trying to figure out how I was going to get that doll and give her a thorough bath.   Food was the answer.  It was past dinner time and she was hungry, so the doll was “accidentally” left in the car along with the shoes.  It’s such an ugly little thing.  Bug will probably have it forever (if I give it back to her).  Matilda might be a good name for her.

Update:
I snuck the doll into the house and gave her a long, hot, soapy bath.  Then I spent forever combing out her hair and cut about three inches off of it.   Her hair wasn’t in the best of condition, so I braided it, making sure the pink parts showed.   I found a dress that a teddy bear had on and put it on the doll.  Once Bug had her bath and settled down for the evening, I brought out Dollie.  Bug was so excited.  She kept saying, “pretty,” “Princess!” and “Thank you Mama!” over and over.  She hugged and loved on that doll until bedtime.   Daddy was amazed it was the same doll.  I have to say, I was pretty proud of myself.   Unfortunately, I didn’t take a picture of Dollie before, but I did after. 

That face made it all worth it! 

It is a good reminder that maybe we need to look beyond the grimy and disheveled because sometimes there is a beautiful princess underneath.

My girls are as different as night and day.  Not only their hair and eye color, but in some of their mannerisms and behaviors.  

Bug was slow and delicate when she ate her ice cream cone.  It was melting faster than she was eating it, so I helped out and licked up the drips (a great sacrifice on my part - HA!).   She ate part of the ice cream and then was done.  She didn’t even want any of the yummy cone part.   She also didn’t get very messy - just some around her mouth and hands and tiny bit on her pajamas. 

Littlest on the other hand, dug right in.  If I took it away from her to get a drip, she would whimper and get ready to cry.   She devoured it, down to the last inch of the cone and was very messy.   That girl will not get ice cream very often or she will be the biggest ex-preemie ever!

Friday night I was supposed to get together with two friends from high school and enjoy an evening of reminiscing and laughter, but it wasn’t to be.   One of the girls wasn’t feeling well.  I was all cleaned up and nowhere to go.  Daddy made an emergency call to Nana who came right over and Daddy and I had an impromptu date night.  I was so excited to actually get out alone with him, I didn’t really pay attention to what we were doing until I was sitting in the theater….getting ready to watch the new Star Trek movie.   How in the heck did I get here?!   I admit I’ve seen a bunch (probably all) of the old Star Treks, most of the old movies and a few of the newer ones.   I don’t remember a lot, but enjoyed it at the time.   So here I am sitting in the theater starting to watch this “stupid” movie when I find myself enjoying it…ALOT!   It was a totally awesome movie that I will have to see again.   The new actors were great and did justice to the old actors.  

and the old

or oncoming train? 

I’m probably jinxing everything by talking about it since we only have a verbal agreement right now, but it’s been a huge boost to our mental well being.  I hope this is the start of a trend upward.